Thursday, February 9, 2012

awkwardness averted!


Our "confrontation" appointment was yesterday at 8:10 and I am happy to say it went well. I was so nervous about the appointment; nervous about what to say and how to say it. MBL asked if I wanted to take lead on what to say and I thought I was going to be fine doing so, but then something I didn't foresee happened and I was left basically speechless. When the doc came in for our consult, he brought the nurse from our IUI with him. Now, keep in mind, he had no idea why we were there. I merely made the appointment as a follow up to our IUI and that's all I said to both the scheduler and the nurse. So, when he walked in with the nurse, he had no idea how awkward it made the whole situation. And, neither did MBL. All he said was this is C, she is a new nurse here, so I've asked her to observe our consult. MBL took lead on the conversation as I silently tried to figure out how to appropriately phrase our concerns/issues without making the nurse feel super awkward. Thankfully, MBL is really good with people and was able to address our concerns with the spe.rm fiasco in a tactful manner. He reminded the doc that we pay out of pocket for everything and that we had made it clear to both the lab and the nurses that we were concerned about his count. He told him that we wouldn't have wanted to go through with the IUI had we known that the total count was only 1.5. At that point the doc asked if I had verified the total count and my husband's name/birth date before the actual IUI. I told him I had. I'm not sure if he was trying to say that we could have backed out at that point and, to be honest, I was a little peeved that he was trying to insinuate that. BUT, he didn't say anything else regarding that, so I didn't have to get all defensive.

Then came the point where MBL brought up the actual IUI and I realized I was going to have to say something. He kept saying, "I guess there was a new nurse" and, finally, C (the new nurse) spoke up and told him that it was she that did my IUI. I explained that I understand that everyone has to learn somehow, but that the IUI was really painful and I did express that to both nurses. I did not say this in our meeting, but I do not blame the new nurse, I really feel like the "supervising" nurse should have stepped in and taken over. Thankfully, the new nurse handled it very well and didn't make the situation any more awkward than it already was. I never wanted to confront her and I felt bad that she was (very likely) surprised by our meeting. Poor girl.

That being said, the doc made the whole meeting as comfortable as humanly possible. He agreed that 1.5 million was not a good count and went on to say that he wants to run another SA on MBL and make sure that we have good swimmers with which to work. He said that he would have the lab do the analysis and then freeze the sample at no cost to us. He said we could combine that sample with a fresh one for our IUI. He also, without any prompting from us, said that they would do our IUI at no cost as well. The doc didn't let his ego rule the meeting and handled the whole situation so well. We are thankful that the doc was willing to listen to us and was more generous in our "compensation" than we were expecting.

On a side note... MBL asked the new nurse why she looked familiar and she explained that she used to work at the other RE's office (we went there for our ultrasounds/blood work during our last IVF). After the meeting was over and MBL and I were alone, I realized that the reason the nurse looked so familiar was that she was the one who always drew my blood at that office. And she could NEVER find the vein in my arm and would always have to draw from my hand. It was so painful and I was so glad when I was done going there for lab draws! It was pretty funny to realize that my only experiences with that nurse have been negative! (although, to be fair, she was always very sweet...just not very good at her job). **In case you're curious about what I said about her previously, you can read about it here.

While we were there, we got in my ultrasound and saw that there were at least 5 follies developing. They were all between 11-13mm. I have another ultrasound scheduled for Saturday to see how things have developed and I'm really hoping that all five are still growing. I want MBL's swimmers to have as many targets as possible! Now, normally, a cycle is cancelled when there are more than 3 follicles, but I doubt they'll cancel me as I have SIX failed IUIs in my history.

In all likelihood, we will have our IUI on Monday. It's the day before Valentine's and I would just love to get a belated gift of a BFP!!! I'm trying not to get too hopeful, but, if I'm being honest, I am REALLY hoping that it works. I am praying for stellar counts, five mature eggs, and one (or two) take home babies. It would just be so amazing to be able to skip the whole IVF drama...

Speaking of Valentine's Day, do you have anything fun planned? And, what kind of gift are you hoping to receive (chocolate? wine? extra sleep?)?


  1. I'm so so so happy for you guys that the doctor is "fixing" the mistakes made. Funny about the nurse and yet not at all. Good luck!!!

  2. I'm sending you good thoughts! I really really hope this is your month!!

  3. Wow, that meeting went better than expected. I like the word "free" associated with almost anything!