So, they ran my blood again to get an HCG number at it came back at 5 at 12dpo. At first I thought, "Betas have to start somewhere, right?" Then we went back for another test at 14dpo and it was at the same level. When I spoke with the nurse from our clinic all she said is anything under 10 is considered negative by the lab. I asked her why I would have anything over 2 in my system if I hadn't taken a trigger shot and why would my temps be so high if nothing had happened? She asked if I was on progesterone (I'm not) and then said that it's possible something happened and to call them in a week if I hadn't gotten AF. Well, this morning my temp went down and I just *feel* AF coming. I think I'm relieved. Rather than continuing to wait and see I feel like I now have my answer. My theory as to what happened? I think that this was a chemical pregnancy. Most tests were darkest on Sunday, so I'm guessing that's when my HCG was highest. All were lighter, except for the Answer, on Monday when I had my blood draw. It's nice to know that my egg can actually meet DH's sperm even if it didn't result in a pregnancy. It's a relief. In our 18 months of TTC I have never had anything higher than a 2 on my beta test and I have never gotten a positive home test, so it was nice to see it could (sort of) happen.
The good news? I feel totally at peace with our next steps. We have decided to go forward with the shared risk program at our new clinic. It will involve a few more trips to the clinic and $6,000 more dollars, but it guarantees a take home baby or an 80% refund. One cycle at our new clinic would cost right around $10,000 and the shared risk costs $16,000 and allows for 3 fresh cycles and as many frozen cycles as it takes to get a take home baby. If something happens to the baby during the pregnancy at any point, we get to do another cycle at little cost to us (just the meds). It's a piece of mind that I feel will be invaluable. We may end up getting pregnant on the first cycle and will have then spent $6,0000 more than we would have on one cycle, but at this point, we need the security of added cycles if we need them and the guarantee of a baby in our arms. I now see our infertility journey as something I will overcome. There is absolutely no reason why I shouldn't be able to get pregnant after 3 more fresh IVF cycles, so I truly believe that I will get to experience pregnancy, birth, and motherhood in the next year or so. And one of the best parts for me is that the likelihood of me not being a mom by my 26th birthday (October 2011) is slim. I think I am excited to go down this route and to finally be taking big steps towards our dream of being parents.