Saturday, January 7, 2012

recognizing IF

The other night, on my way home from my hair cut, I stopped at the local drugstore to pick up a box of tamp.ons. I was already feeling kind of bitter about the fact that I had to buy a box of those things again and when I went to the front of the store, the line was three people deep. Now, that may not seem like that long, but it was moving slowly. It seriously took five minutes for the next person in line to get rung up. Part of the issue was that one cashier was being tied up with a customer who was buying an arsenal of supplements. To top that off, he wanted to double check the price with the ad for each and every bottle. I was getting quite tired of waiting, when all of a sudden I realized the similarities between all of the supplements. In his cart he had DH.EA, CoQ10, Ni.acin, and Fol.ic Acid. Now, perhaps there are other reasons for needing those supplements, but having just done my own reading on increasing egg quality, I know that all of those are used to increase fertility. I seriously considered asking him in the parking lot if he was going through infertility, but I thought that might be going a bit too far. I just hope that if he is facing the ugly beast that is IF, that he comes out on the other side victorious and soon.

The second situation of the past week, relating to IF, happened a little closer to home. Due to our appointment in Chic.ago and Christmas/Anniversary festivities, we were unable to get together with MBL's family until today. Usually this is a somewhat stressful situation as MBL's sister and mom are tightly wound. Taking xa.nax or having a drink prior to spending time with them is generally a good idea. That being said, since having Piper I've been trying to take a more relaxed approach to life and family. We were enjoying our time together when it came time for MBL's mom to open a present from Piper. It was the Willo.w Tree Grandmother figurine. When she opened it, she started tearing up and thanking us for such a beautiful, meaningful gift. I didn't expect the reaction, but I was glad that she enjoyed it. Later, when MBL and I were talking about the gathering, he mentioned that his sister also started crying when MBL's mom opened the figurine. And, then, something that should have been clear for years smacked me in the face. MBL's sister is facing her own kind of infertility. She is 37 years old and is just now (finally) in a good relationship with a great guy. MBL pointed out that she was crying because she wants to have kids and it hasn't happened yet (due to not being in the right relationship until this point). I had never thought of things from her perspective before and I feel bad about that. I also feel bad for her because, in all reality, she needs to get on the TTC bandwagon as soon as possible. I feel awful that our joy caused her pain (and it's definitely justified pain as she probably always assumed she'd have the 1st grandkid). My SIL and I have always had an awkward relationship, but today I realized we had more in common than I originally thought.

Stupid IF, why are you everywhere?

1 comment:

  1. Such a bitter sweet post. I too remember when I had that 'ah-ha moment' of others who are close to me that are having their own form of IF. It was an eye opener and has definitely given me some perspective.

    Stupid IF, indeed!