Back at it!

I'm finally getting back into my groove and getting on here to post!  I can't believe that it's been three weeks since I last posted.  I traveled way more than I had originally intended over Thanksgiving, so that left me with very little time to get on here and read updates or even update myself.  But, I'm back now and I'm going to try and be better about posting on a regular basis.

One of the most exciting (??) updates is that I'm finally cycling again!!  The return of AF is only welcome because it means we are officially back on the TTC wagon!  Oh how I loathe that wagon...  But, maybe, just maybe, it will be easier this time around?  Or, at least, cheaper?  I haven't had a real heart to heart with MBL yet, but I set up an appointment with our fertility doc for December 21st.  No, we're jumping into treatments right away, but I want to check in with him and hear his thoughts on our IVF cycle.  You see, we went to an out of town clinic to do the IVF cycle that actually got us pregnant and we really liked to doctor...  So, as long as we are going to be back in his neck of the woods for Christmas, I want to have a face to face chat with him.  We know that I can get pregnant (via IVF), but I want to hear his thoughts on us getting pregnant naturally.  During that cycle I had all sorts of testing done (because we were doing shared risk) and one of the tests done was AMH and my results came back at 0.9.  Normal is between 1.0 and 3.0.  Anything above 3.0 could suggest PCOS and anything below 1.0 could suggest low ovarian reserve.  AMH does not measure egg quality.  When that result came back I was shocked.  How could I, at 24, have a slightly below normal reading?  When I voiced my concerns to the nurse, she explained that it's a newer test and they take the results with a grain of salt.  They use my other tests to get a better picture of my fertility.  Well, I have a great antral count (28-30), low FSH (around 6.5), and a nice looking ute.  Plus, I have been able to get pregnant (with the help of $25,000 and a medical professional).  BUT, I worry that maybe I do have a fertility problem.  All along we thought it was MBL who was functioning subpar, but what if I contribute to that equation?  Both of my egg retrievals resulted in more drugs and less eggs than expected.  Our last cycle resulted in only 4 mature eggs/embryos.  Is that a symptom of reduced fertility on my end?  Especially when you consider our other cycle resulted in only 3 embryos?  I have been so scared to voice these concerns because I don't want it to be me.  Low egg quality is not something that is easy to fix.  BUT, I want to know what the doctor thinks because if it is low egg quality, then MBL and I need to be serious about cramming these babies in!  MBL wants to putter around with naturally TTC for a while before we seek treatment again (which I can totally understand--wouldn't it be exciting to get pregnant from s.e.x.?), but I don't want to waste precious time if my eggs are headed down the crapper.  I feel so blinkin' lucky to have Piper, I really do, but I want her to have a sibling or two!  My goal is to be done having babies by the time I'm thirty (in approximately 4 years) and to have three children.  So, I need/want to fit in two more pregnancies.

So...  In about two weeks MBL and I will be even more officially back on the TTC wagon as we enter into our first two week wait post Piper.  My test date should be right around our 3rd anniversary and, I have to admit, I am praying with every fiber of my being for a miracle BFP!