Thursday, December 2, 2010

I think she may be a fertile...

So, today I had my 16 week OB appointment, even though I am only 15w3d. My OB appointments are absolutely nothing to write home about. I get weighed, have my blood pressure taken, wait 5-10 minutes, and then meet with the doctor. She listens to the baby's heartbeat and asks me if I have any questions and then leaves--oh and she's usually running no less than 15-20 minutes behind. She is very nice and chipper, but I kind of get the impression that she is likely a fertile. Now don't get me wrong, I think that some fertiles are able to relate to us IFers in amazing ways. I know people who have never struggled with infertility and yet have an uncanny ability to be sensitive and understanding to my worries/fears/feelings. My OB? Is not one of those people. And that is just plain old unfortunate. For example? From day one despite my history and despite my (understandable) fears, every time I have requested an ultrasound she has made a comment about how my insurance might not cover it and that I won't continue to get ultrasounds just because I am bleeding/scared/whatever (BTW--my insurance has covered My problem with this is that I know of people whose OBs make a point to understand their fears and their historys. This past weekend my mom happened to remind me that my aunt had a m/c at 20 weeks due to an incompetent cervix. After the puke fest that was Monday night, I had pain and "secretions" Tuesday. That worried me and everything I read said it was worth mentioning to my OB. So I mentioned it. She basically said that the only way to measure cervical length is through an ultrasound and there is no way that insurance companies can cover them for all OB patients just to catch the one or two patients that have an incompetent cervix. Now, I'm not really that concerned that I have an incompetent cervix, but her comment really bothered me. She seems more concerned about steering me away from ultrasounds than listening to my fears or giving me medical reassurance regarding my symptoms.
And I think that her comment especially pissed me off because I know of at least two other OBs in the area who listen to their patients and give them ultrasounds (even if they're brief) whenever they need reassurance that everything is all right in there. As a matter of fact, one of these friends goes to an OB where they offer ultrasounds on Tuesdays and Thursdays to whomever may be worried or need a peek at their baby. This friend's husband just happens to work with MBL, so we have the SAME EXACT insurance and never once has an ultrasound claim been denied and she's had 6-7 of them already and she's only 24 weeks!! So, I know that my OB is fully of phooey!! Soooo, why do I continue to see my OB? Because she is one of the few FEMALE OBs that deliver at the hospital closest to our house. The dream OB office mentioned above...the one that offers ultrasounds twice a week? They do not deliver there. AHHHHH!!!
Oh, and I think I'm particularly cranky because I was hoping to see our baby, check my cervical length, and verify once and for all that it's a girl in there prior to or around Christmas when I'll be 18-19 weeks, BUT she is making me wait until I am over 20 weeks and that is the EARLIEST she'll let me come in. She even made a point to say she makes some patients wait until they're 22 weeks.
After writing all this down, I think I may just be too unhappy with the care I'm receiving with this OB. MBL thinks I should check out other doctors because he isn't impressed with her responses either. I don't go calling the nurse line at all hours of the day and I haven't had a diagnostic ultrasound since 8 weeks...I really don't think I'm being all that crazy (for a nervous infertile, anyway). So, I guess I need to start searching...

Oh, and in light of the fact that my next baby check isn't until January 6th, MBL and I went ahead and booked another ultrasound in Chic.ago for three days before Christmas when I'll be 18w2d, it'll only cost us $30 and we'll get another peek at the LO. Assuming I don't meet with a new OB prior to that, I will likely try to convince the tech to verify that my cervix isn't shrinking into oblivion.


  1. Good for you for demanding service. It's one thing to do your job, but it's quite another to do it well - and part of a doctor's job is to understand those who you're treating. As a teacher, I can't imagine telling a student, "You will probably get an F on this test, but I'm not going to help you through it if you don't." You deserve to be guided through this time, not told what to do.

  2. Don't be afraid to switch doctors! I did. I LOVE my new doctor. I've had 6-7 ultrasounds so far because he seriously is one to just take a peek to make sure everything is okay and I'm happy. AND - he doesn't bill insurance every time, because they have it in the office. I couldn't be happier with my switch. Let me know if you want his info. :-)

  3. Mary Anne George. Delivered every one of my nieces and nephew and even stopped into see me when I delivered Belle b/c she knew me due to my family. She is amazing and her office is at 44th and Kalamazoo. Love her. Although, she delivers at SPectrum. Upside of Spectrum over Metro--they have a neonatal unit if something is wrong with the baby. Metro does not, although Metro has AMAZING birthing and post partum rooms.

  4. I also get frustrated by how perfunctory the visits are. Like, really? That's it? How important is the hospital to you? Is it worth the pain of not be happy with your OB? Maybe it's time for a change...HUGS.

  5. Switch - the hospital stay is only a few days - the OB is for much longer. I LOVE my doctor and the practice, they don't deliver at the hospital I would prefer but I'll take great care over the best hospital bed any day.

    I never feel rushed, I never feel silly or stupid, they always listen and's worth it. Oh and for what it's worth - my main OB is a man - I have seen the ladies in the practice while on rotation during this pregnancy but I still prefer my main one.

  6. I agree. I'm sure the next closest hospital isn't that far away. You will get to the hospital on time. Find an OB that does not add to your stress, but that gives you appointments that help keep you less stressed in between.

  7. Wow...I really like Ashlee's comment above. I couldn't have said it better!

  8. I have to agree with the senitments of changing to a new (nicer)Dr. Remember - you are the "customer" YOU are paying her - she works for YOU. If you don't like her "service" then it's your right to shop around. After all that you have been through, especially with all that you have been through, you deserve to be pampered to the point of not having any stress while going to your appts. You should feel relief, not angst when you go see your Dr.
    Switch... switch.... switch and write this lame Dr a nice letter telling her why you switched - it may feel good to get it off your chest.
    Hang in there!!

  9. So glad that you and bubs are doing well.

    I can't believe she said "just to catch the one or two patients that have an incompetent cervix". For those one or two patients, catching this in time can mean a life-saving intervention.

    Is it possible to go to one hopital for all your check-ups, and then another one for your delivery? You deserve a doctor who takes you seriously.