So, today I had my 16 week OB appointment, even though I am only 15w3d. My OB appointments are absolutely nothing to write home about. I get weighed, have my blood pressure taken, wait 5-10 minutes, and then meet with the doctor. She listens to the baby's heartbeat and asks me if I have any questions and then leaves--oh and she's usually running no less than 15-20 minutes behind. She is very nice and chipper, but I kind of get the impression that she is likely a fertile. Now don't get me wrong, I think that some fertiles are able to relate to us IFers in amazing ways. I know people who have never struggled with infertility and yet have an uncanny ability to be sensitive and understanding to my worries/fears/feelings. My OB? Is not one of those people. And that is just plain old unfortunate. For example? From day one despite my history and despite my (understandable) fears, every time I have requested an ultrasound she has made a comment about how my insurance might not cover it and that I won't continue to get ultrasounds just because I am bleeding/scared/whatever (BTW--my insurance has covered every.single.one.). My problem with this is that I know of people whose OBs make a point to understand their fears and their historys. This past weekend my mom happened to remind me that my aunt had a m/c at 20 weeks due to an incompetent cervix. After the puke fest that was Monday night, I had pain and "secretions" Tuesday. That worried me and everything I read said it was worth mentioning to my OB. So I mentioned it. She basically said that the only way to measure cervical length is through an ultrasound and there is no way that insurance companies can cover them for all OB patients just to catch the one or two patients that have an incompetent cervix. Now, I'm not really that concerned that I have an incompetent cervix, but her comment really bothered me. She seems more concerned about steering me away from ultrasounds than listening to my fears or giving me medical reassurance regarding my symptoms.
And I think that her comment especially pissed me off because I know of at least two other OBs in the area who listen to their patients and give them ultrasounds (even if they're brief) whenever they need reassurance that everything is all right in there. As a matter of fact, one of these friends goes to an OB where they offer ultrasounds on Tuesdays and Thursdays to whomever may be worried or need a peek at their baby. This friend's husband just happens to work with MBL, so we have the SAME EXACT insurance and never once has an ultrasound claim been denied and she's had 6-7 of them already and she's only 24 weeks!! So, I know that my OB is fully of phooey!! Soooo, why do I continue to see my OB? Because she is one of the few FEMALE OBs that deliver at the hospital closest to our house. The dream OB office mentioned above...the one that offers ultrasounds twice a week? They do not deliver there. AHHHHH!!!
Oh, and I think I'm particularly cranky because I was hoping to see our baby, check my cervical length, and verify once and for all that it's a girl in there prior to or around Christmas when I'll be 18-19 weeks, BUT she is making me wait until I am over 20 weeks and that is the EARLIEST she'll let me come in. She even made a point to say she makes some patients wait until they're 22 weeks.
After writing all this down, I think I may just be too unhappy with the care I'm receiving with this OB. MBL thinks I should check out other doctors because he isn't impressed with her responses either. I don't go calling the nurse line at all hours of the day and I haven't had a diagnostic ultrasound since 8 weeks...I really don't think I'm being all that crazy (for a nervous infertile, anyway). So, I guess I need to start searching...
Oh, and in light of the fact that my next baby check isn't until January 6th, MBL and I went ahead and booked another ultrasound in Chic.ago for three days before Christmas when I'll be 18w2d, it'll only cost us $30 and we'll get another peek at the LO. Assuming I don't meet with a new OB prior to that, I will likely try to convince the tech to verify that my cervix isn't shrinking into oblivion.