things that surprise me...

Lately I feel like my whole life has been turned upside down... And, really it has. In May I become a mom and last week I took on a new title of working mom. There is so much about my "new" life that surprises me...

-For starters, I am surprised that I am still pumping. I was going to give up back in June when I got mastitis for the first time. I then realized that I could pump 3 times a day and still get the 7-8oz I was producing when I was pumping 7-8 times a day. I've never made enough for Piper, but it makes me feel good that she is still getting some breastmilk. MBL had a TON of allergies as a kid and we know that breastmilk can help prevent some of that, so we both feel like it's good for me to continue pumping. I did get mastitis AGAIN, but it didn't make me want to give up, so for now I'm going to continue carting around my BFF: the pump.

-Another thing that surprises me is how much I LOVE staying home with Piper. I absolutely adore it. Why does this surprise me? Well, to be honest, as a babysitter, I sometimes found hanging out with kids ALL DAY to be kind of boring (please don't throw stones!). I mean I love kids and all and I think it's so neat to see them interact and change, but sometimes it was quite daunting to have to "entertain" kids all day. Well, as it turns out, it is WAY different with your own kids. I LOVE sitting on the couch and "talking" with Piper. It's funny because she actually tires of me before I tire of her. I'll want to sit and chat and she'll start fussing and as soon as I turn her around to face the world, she is happy as can be. There have actually been a few times where I've been trying to soothe her by holding/bouncing her and she doesn't stop fussing until I put her in her bouncy! Funny girl.

-On the note of loving staying home, I'm actually also enjoying going to work. I don't love my job, but the first day back was far easier than I expected it to be. It was nice to have other responsibilities than just being a mom (and I use the term "just" loosely as I personally believe it to be a perfectly fantastic job to hold). With my schedule, too, I feel like I get the best of both worlds, I work Wednesdays and every other weekend. She goes to daycare one day a week and then on the weekends when I work she will be home with her daddy. I'm actually glad that MBL will get a chance to parent her by herself... I think it will be good for all of us! Plus with the IVF debt we still have and my school loans coming due, it's nice to have the extra income! We could definitely make it work for me to stay home all the time, but it would mean sacrificing a lot and, at this point, it makes more sense for me to work. And, thankfully, I'm learning that it's not so bad.

-What else is surprising? Just how HARD being a working momma is! I work 10 hours days and I am the one who picks up Piper from daycare. I leave work, go pick her up, head home where I am greeted by a dog that has been neglected all day, and then have to tend to the nightly things like dinner, dishes, feedings, diaper changes, and preparing for the next day. I don't want to start a debate on this, but I am beyond impressed by mommas who do this every day... My hat goes off to all those working moms who somehow manage to get it all done! I don't think I could do it.

-Speaking of that, I am surprised by just how much work being a stay at home mom is. I knew it was going to be tough, but I'm surprised by how wonderful and yet equally difficult it is. Trying to accomplish all that needs to get done on a daily basis is truly a large task. I don't know how households with two working parents do it. My house is a disaster, even though I spend a large part of my time trying to keep it clean. I am convinced that if I worked full time we would need to hire a maid.

-Lastly, I am surprised by just how ready I am to start trying for #2. I am equally surprised by just how eager MBL is, too. I've decided that I really want my kids to be close in age. Ideally, I'd like to be done by the time I'm thirty, which gives us 4 years and 2 months to have two more children. I know I'm being rather bold by assuming I'll be able to have those children, but I'm holding on to optimism over here :). Actually, MBL and I have decided that if it takes another $25,000 to get our second child, then we will probably just have two kids. I really want three (at one point we wanted four...), but I don't want to sacrifice future family trips and weeks at camp in order to get to that number. We're just waiting for my cycle to start and then we'll begin the fun process of temping and timing and waiting and hoping... All over again!

whirlwind...

Wow! I feel like it's been forever since I was last on here! The title of this post fully explains the type of summer we have had... A whirlwind. We returned from our family vacation on Monday and it had been 17 days since I was last at our house. Crazy, right? We were in Chicago for my sister's shower and I stayed there for a few extra days while MBL went to San Diego for a conference. And, I joined him there without Piper. That's right, we've already had our first baby-less trip! I was really nervous about leaving her, but she was with my capable parents. It was too good of an opportunity to pass up; my parents were available to watch Piper, MBL's flight was paid for and so was most of our hotel, and we used miles for me to fly there. We could have brought Piper with us, but I was too nervous about exposing her to all the germs on the airplane and too nervous about navigating four airports without any help. I LOVED San Diego and would totally move there in a heartbeat, BUT my parents are here in the Midwest, so this is where we will stay (for now).

When I returned from San Diego, we packed up and headed to a cottage on a lake for our annual family vacation. It's one of our favorite weeks of the year and this year was no different. We had a blast going out on the boat, taking Piper swimming, playing with our nephews, playing games late into the evening, and going to the zoo. It went by WAY too fast!! I love being surrounded by family and waking up to a house full of the people I love. I SOOOO wish MBL and I lived in the same area as my parents because spending time with them is just one of my most favorite things and I love that they are getting a chance to see Piper grow up. Eventually we will live closer than three hours away...

So, I can't believe it, but Piper is already 11 weeks old!! We had her two month appointment on Monday (overdue because of our vacations) and she is 22.75 inches and 11 lb 1oz. Her weight is the 40th percentile, her height is in the 48th percentile, and her head is in the 87th!! I swear she doesn't look like a bobble head doll! We also got her vaccinated, which was great because she starts daycare next week. Speaking of that, I cannot believe my maternity leave is nearly over. I'm absolutely dreading going back to work. I only work one day during the week and every other weekend, so Piper will only be at daycare one day a week, which is really ideal. Although more ideal for me would be if I didn't have to work at all! BUT, we still have about $5,000 left to pay on our IVF and then we have to start working on my school loans. Because I work 20 hours a week but only two days, we're maximizing our income while minimizing our expenses... I just wish I didn't have to work every other weekend! I hate that I'll be missing out on quality family time with MBL and Piper!

There is so much more to update on, but I need to get some chores done before Piper wakes up from her nap. So, I will leave you with two pictures; the first is when she was one month old and the second is from Monday (2.5 months). I can't believe how fast she is growing!

One month old:


Two months old: